Pleasure Practice

It was another early morning of training today, and I'll be honest, I was dreading it.  First of all, uh...3:30 am... again.  And, belly discomfort...again.  Beyond both of those, I knew today we'd be practicing the Pleasure Practice modality in Nonlinear Movement.  

There are 5 modalities in Nonlinear, and we're being certified to teach 4 of them. The modalities are Move What You're Feeling, Release, Pleasure Practice, and Inviting In.  I won't go into too much detail.  Suffice to say, Nonlinear is an embodiment practice, so all of these modalities are about being in, and moving in the body.  Three of the 4 are no big deal.  For me, I mean.  I've been practicing ecstatic dance for a long time, and I'm an ecstatic ritualist, so getting into my feelings, shaking them off, and even embodying what I'd like to have in my life is easy and well-practiced.  Then there's the "pleasure" thing. I don't have anything against joy, happiness, pleasure...the good stuff.  I don't.  But getting into my body, moving and touching, and DELIBERATELY working with pleasure....oi.  That's another story, and I didn't really even know it until I started this practice.  My first introduction to the Pleasure Practice was 2 months ago, and I almost crawled out of my skin.  Body image, old sex stuff....shame.  So much junk came up.

So, I was dreading today.  I knew we'd be practicing our teaching method, and I knew that we'd also have to DO the practice multiple times. Ugh.

But it was...

Good.

Really good.

For some reason, today, nothing felt triggery. The initial practice, with our teacher, was the longest, and it was gentle, easy, and really low-key. I felt comfortable with my own experience, and I didn't feel like I HAD to do anything a particular way. The music was nice, the prompts were good.  I wasn't feeling particularly well, so I was deliberately slow and easy with myself. Then, we were put into breakout rooms, and I was grouped with 2 really lovely beings. Just being in space with them, even on Zoom, felt soft and kind and open.  

Nonlinear is all about promoting personal inquiry, so the teacher is really more of a facilitator. They don't DO much except prompt the student to keep moving and keep exploring.  During practice, we're looking for our own bodily wisdom... So.  I know that my good experience wasn't because my teachers did anything particular or didn't do anything particular.  I don't know exactly WHY today's Pleasure Practices were so juicy.  But they were.

Maybe it was because I was wearing my Wool& Willow again.  She's really comfortable and just 3 days into the 100 days already feels like a friend.